One of the best ways to build your confidence is by being your own unique self. It’s so much easier to be confident when you’re being authentically you than it is when you’re trying to be who others think you should be.
That’s one thing I’ve seen (and done) too many times. When you’re feeling low on confidence, you don’t think the real you is worth anything so you do whatever you can to hide behind a mask. And sometimes you can get so caught up in being what other people want you to be that you lose your own sense of self. And that leads to even lower self-confidence and self-esteem.
One of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do was learn to be the real me again after my divorce. Honestly, I’m still a work in progress on that front. Here are a few of the things I work at on a daily basis to let the real Ruthie show herself.
10 Ways to Share Your Unique Self
You do yourself a disservice any time you pretend to be something that you’re not. This does such a number on your self-esteem it’s not even funny, because you’re not only being dishonest with the people around you, you’re being dishonest with yourself. If you have to hide your true self to be around certain people, maybe it’s time to rethink those relationships and find people who accept and embrace your true self in all its quirky glory.
Improve your conversation skills.
So much of our personality comes from what we say and how we say it. It’s hard to share your unique self if you can’t communicate effectively. Building relationships is all about communicating with others, so by building up your conversation skills, it will become easier to not only share yourself but to learn and grow by listening to others as well.
Be a good listener too.
It shouldn’t be a surprise that developing good listening skills goes hand in hand with good conversation skills. This is one way to create a connection with other people, because when you really listen to them it makes them feel important.
Where this comes in handy for you as someone learning to be yourself is that the better the connection you make with another person, the easier it is for you to be your real self around them. Cool, huh?
Have an opinion.
And be okay with sharing it once in a while. That doesn’t mean you have to be one of those loud, obnoxious people who think everyone needs to hear their opinions on everything. In fact, most people don’t share their opinions because they don’t want to be seen like that.
But here’s the thing… Confident people have opinions. Unique people have opinions. You’ll have much better relationships with people when you’re asked for your opinion and you can say something other than “I don’t know” or “Whatever works for you.”
Develop the art of sharing your opinion, especially when you’re asked for it. You’ll be more real and more confident that way.
Do what you love.
This is so important, not only for being yourself and building your confidence, but for living a full life as a whole. You have got to find ways to do the things you love to do.
People with low self-esteem tend to go along with what everyone else wants to do and never let anyone know what they’d really rather be doing. (I know because I did this for years when I was married.)
You can give yourself a real boost when you take the time to do things you love. Whether it’s playing the piano, learning to paint, or volunteering at the local animal shelter, for example, doing what you love brings out the best in you and people can see that. You’ll shine because you’re being the real you.
Share your positive attitude.
If a negative attitude brings out the worst in a person, the opposite is also true. Showing your positive attitude brings out the best in you and uplifts those around you too. It also allows your true personality to shine because it’s much easier to be yourself when you’re feeling good about yourself.
Show respect to others.
It may seem like a small thing, but just as you deserve respect from others, they also deserve respect from you. It’s easy to be confident when you’re showing your best self to others, because you know you’re at your best. And when you’re at your best you can also feel your most confident because your realness and integrity shine through.
If you’re not relaxed, you’re protecting yourself. If you’re protecting yourself, you’re creating stress for yourself. When you’re stressed, you can’t be your real self because you’re worried about what others are thinking.
Instead of getting stressed at new situations or social situations where you feel less than confident, relax and let your light shine. Show those around you your humorous side. It’s much easier to share your uniqueness when you’re feeling happy and light than it is when you’re feeling dark and stressed.
[tbpquotable]Share your uniqueness, build your confidence, and let the real you shine![/tbpquotable]
Build your social circle.
Earlier in this post, we talked about having an opinion and sharing it. When you do that, you open yourself up to meeting new people and experiencing new things. You also expose yourself to others’ opinions and cultures as well as ideas you may not have considered before.
Your uniqueness will grow along with your experiences instead of stagnating by always being with the same people whose ideas and opinions never change.
The thing is, you can’t build your self-confidence in a vacuum. You need to be out and about building relationships and interacting with people who accept and respect you for who you really are. Do one thing every day to show your unique self, and your self-esteem and confidence levels will grow too.
Soak up information.
Read a book. Research topics that interest you and issues that matter to you. The more varied interests you have, the more unique and well-developed your personality becomes. And the more developed you are socially and intellectually, the more confident you will become.
Don’t be afraid to let your friends and family see the real you. If the people around you aren’t accepting of who you really are, then maybe it really is time to widen your circle and connect with people who are interested in the same things you are. It’s much easier to be confident when you’re spending time with people who get where you’re coming from, instead of with people to whom you continually have to explain yourself.
So share your uniqueness, build your confidence, and let the real you shine!
What makes you unique? Leave a comment and share your thoughts!