We’re going to spend the next couple of days focusing on the ‘B’ in our ABCs – believing in yourself. Because it doesn’t matter how many confidence tips you put into action, or how many blog posts you read, if you don’t believe in yourself and believe that you can be confident, you won’t be. And it’s that simple.
When your self-esteem is at a healthy level, everything seems to flow so much more smoothly in your life. You are happier, healthier, and more able to live life to the full potential you were meant to. But so many people don’t live up to their full potential because they don’t believe they are worthy of success, happiness and even love.
When you don’t believe in yourself, and your self-esteem is in the gutter, it’s really hard to see just how you could be worthy of love, happiness, or success. After all, who can love you when you can’t even love yourself? Who can see the beautiful, confident you when you don’t see yourself as beautiful or confident?
We’ve been at this for 26 days already, and I know you can change your beliefs and see yourself as confident. And I know it’s hard, it takes courage, and pushes your comfort zone to the limit.
I also know how hard it is to change the belief that you are not worthy. Especially if you’ve been in a relationship where there was emotional or physical abuse. It’s hard to believe in yourself when the person who was supposed to love, cherish and protect you instead spent their time breaking you down and destroying your self-esteem. It took me over ten years to recover to the point where I wanted to even try to go out and face the world. Writing an article like this to tell you about it would have been unthinkable before now.
Fortunately, there are ways to overcome low self-esteem and reclaim your belief in yourself — ones that won’t turn you into a hermit like me.
Here are five tips for boosting your self-esteem and restoring your belief in yourself.
1. Learn to say thank you.
One of the hardest things to do when you have low self-esteem is to accept a compliment. Since you have this ingrained belief that you are ugly, stupid, unlovable or whatever you’ve been told is the reason you’re unworthy of love and success, it’s almost impossible to believe that there are still people out there who will see through all that and tell you how beautiful you are, inside and out.
Learning to say thank you and just accept the compliment instead of trying to explain why someone is wrong about you is one of the best things you can do to boost your self-esteem. While it may be hard at first to accept a compliment at face value, it does get easier the more often it happens.
Knowing that there are people out there who do see the good in you is an incredible boost to your self-esteem and your confidence. The more you smile and say thank you, the more you start to believe it for yourself and the stronger your own self-confidence becomes. Before you know it, you will be accepting compliments like a pro.
2. Accept Yourself and Your Uniqueness
It’s easy to compare yourself to others and find yourself lacking when you suffer from low self-esteem. There’s always someone who is prettier than you, smarter than you, richer than you.
In order to break this habit, remember that you are your own unique person, and you have qualities and strengths that no one else has. Focusing on your strengths and what makes you unique will go a long way toward improving your self-esteem.
3. Affirm your uniqueness.
It’s not enough to just say that you are unique. It’s believing it in the very heart of your being that makes the difference. Using affirmations to remind yourself that you are unique and worthy of love, happiness, and success is a good way to build up your self esteem. The more you tell yourself you are worthy, the more you being to believe it.
Affirmations are great because they belong totally in the present moment. The instant you say “I AM worthy” you ARE worthy. Even if it’s only for that moment, and you go back to thinking you’re not in the next … that one moment is enough to get you started on the way to improving your view of yourself. The more moments you can string together where you affirm and believe in your own self-worth, the stronger your self-esteem becomes.
4. Avoid negative people as if they were the plague.
As I mentioned yesterday, negative people and negative energy ARE a plague on your confidence and self-esteem. Do not let other people steal your dreams or make you feel bad for following your heart just because they are too afraid to follow their own.
If you can, avoid them at all costs. Sometimes it’s the people who are closest to you who do the most damage because they think they are helping. If you can’t avoid them do your best to limit your exposure and don’t share your goals and dreams with them.
5. Get professional help if you need to.
There are times when our self-esteem has taken such a beating that the only way we can get it back is with professional help. If you can afford it, a life coach is an excellent option to help you see that you are worthy and give you the tools you need to start believing in yourself again.
If hiring a coach is out of your budget range, you can find excellent books and online programs that can help you boost your self-esteem and start living up to your full potential.
Knowing you are worthy of all the good things life has to offer is an important part of being able to live your life to the fullest potential. Yes, it may take some work to get your self-esteem back up to the healthy levels you want, but the results are well worth it.
You can do anything you put your mind to, as long as you believe you can do it. Improving your self-esteem gives you that belief and the confidence to go for your dreams.